guilty coward...

Guilt...
I hate the feeling.


I also hate that I feel guilty for things I shouldn't, or things that other people wouldn't feel guilty about.

Most of my guilt stems from not acting when I should have. From not doing something when something needed to be done by those around.

Part of the 'not doing' stems from my aloofness and denial nature, fear and unfortunately also because of my upbringing.

Have always been taught to stay clear of any trouble. Of not to interfere unless I totally had to.

I unfortunately live this way. Just like so many other people to.

I also hate being such a coward. Fear is something I will never have a grip over I think.


Caught a bus to the station today after so many days of travelling in a cab. Nearly got to the stop when the bus driver braked very suddenly. Lot of people try to get off before the stop cause one entrance of the station is before the stop and people prefer getting into the station from there. Anyway apparently the driver didn't have an option cause a taxi suddenly reversed.
So this 50+ year old man who was standing right in the front, hit his head on the front glass of the bus and his head started bleeding. The driver and conductor told him to sit down on the first seat and cover his wound with a handkerchief. Few people were remaining in the bus. Maybe 7 including the conductor. Some people got off the back of the bus and some passed that uncle and got off. I didn't know what to do and since the bus had totally stopped I had to get off but I wanted to help the old man but I didn't want to get involved in it all. So all I did was that while getting off, I asked the man if he was alright (ya how bright is that). Told him that maybe he should go to a hospital and that there was a hospital close by. So he turned to the driver and told him in Marathi to get him till a hospital. I kept thinking maybe I should offer to go with the old man but then another million thought came into my head -

where would the money come from right away if he needed to be admitted (I didn't have enough cash on me nor are my parents in the city)?
which hospital would he have to be taken to?
would there be some amount he would be able to claim for his treatment?
would he have to file a police complaint?
would he have to take out scans since he hit his head?
How would I manage any running around if I had to?
and lots of other questions.

So all I did was turn to the driver (who at least looked stricken - by what I am not sure) and asked if they would see that the man got to a hospital, and the driver said yes they would. I walked away toward the station feeling like hell.

All I could do in the train was feel stricken too - sick to the core that I just walked away. The old man was alone. He definitely could have used some help even if he didn't explicitly need it.

I also couldn't help but think that if we don't help strangers out in their time of need, how can we expect strangers to help us when we need help and no one we know is around.

The worse part of all of this is, that if the same thing happened tomorrow, I think I would walk off again. I would still feel like shit but I wouldn't act.



I hate being a coward and I hate the guilt I feel.

"all men are dogs"-manoj

So the only reason I put 'manoj' there is cause I'm always politically correct and wouldn't say something like 'all men are dogs' even though I know they are :p

[In case you are wondering why 'Manoj' and no one else is because he openly admits it to being the truth lol. And how & when that happens is very funny and worthy of a whole post when I am in the mood]

Anyway I came across a joke which I liked and thought the title was fitting.

Friendship among women:
A woman doesn't come home at night.
The next day she tells her husband she slept over at a friends' house.
The man calls his wife's 10 best friends. None of them know about it.

Friendship among men:
A man doesn't come home at night.
The next day he tells his wife he slept over at a friends' house.
The woman calls her husbands' 10 best friends. 8 of them say he did sleep over and 2 claim he's still there.

hey baby jee lene de is pal ko - kal ki sochenge kal ko....

Well don't know how much I follow the whole 'Live for today - worry about tomorrow, tomorrow'.

When I was younger everyone thought I was too serious. Of course I never thought the same. I thought that everyone else was too carefree.

Over the years I don't think I have lost my seriousness though it does seem that way. I think it's the whole 'shit happens, I'll deal with it cause I have to' funda. It's not a mantra for my life obviously because if you can prevent mess ups and uncomfortable situations, then you must. But I have realised that there are things beyond my control.

The funny thing though is that I am not angry at the world anymore. When I was younger, I use to get very upset about issues like the environment, population, unemployment, etc. Now I don't really bother. I don't like this 'who cares' attitude much but I do find myself more at peace. I know in the long run, we are ruining our world because of this 'It's not my problem' attitude but I am just too content at the moment....

61.75%

Yup I passed my MCom Part I exams.

No I am not shocked even though you are.

No I am not giving a party because 62% isn't great.

Yes I do realise that 62% for 2 weeks of non-serious studying is very good but it is still not enough.

No I am not a Post Grad yet and there isn't anything like 1/2 a Post Grad.

Yes I am planning to do Part II.

No I will not study seriously this time around either even though I know I should.

Yes I will post my results of Part II, (if I give my exams), even if I fail.

http://deepalisphotoblog.blogspot.com/

Nothing like a little self promotion.

So a few pictures I totally love. A few are okay okay. A few I haven't even thought of making public.

what a wonderful country we live in...

Cops here are not only corrupt and involved in some of the biggest scams but are also molesters and rapists.

Our army men are also molesters and rapists but also fake killings to get medals.

Hospitals are no more a place to get well but a place to get raped.

We got an 8 year old serial killer. I think we out did the West on this one.

We have pedophile / rapist murderers who are also cannibalistic.

whateva....

Fits every line eh?

tgif...

THANK GOD it's Friday...

Need I say more?

The week has been so hectic, stressful, unproductive...

Gotta love the idea of weekends.

Gaadi Nikalo

Totally loved the dialogue from Life in a Metro -

Mera ek dost hai - uske paas ek nayi gaadi hai jisse usne garage mein 5 saal rakha hai. Pucho kyon...pucho pucho....kyon woh bolta hai ki woh ussi din gaadi nikalega jis din raste ke saar signal green honge.

Konkana says - kya something hai...agar usne gadi nahi nikali toh usse kaise pata chalega ki light green hai ya nahi.

Irrfan Khan says - wohi to wahi toh - gaadi nikalo....

(none)...

I hate when emails don't have subject lines.

A subject line is so cool and more importantly, important. It can help you see check in a second what an email is about, whether it's urgent or not, whether it's a silly forward or a typed out message.

Give your emails a subject line.

It's pouring :'(

I am sure I have already said this but let me re-iterate -

I HATE THE RAINS

Yes it's good for the farmers and nature and temperature and water levels in our lakes and rivers but I still hate the rains.

Thank god it's a Sunday and I am at home.

Though the funniest thing happened. Apparently lightening struck our cable wire and it burnt off and broke into 2, so we have no TV reception.

Kryptonite....

Been listening to the '3 doors down' song with the above title. The song totally rocks.

The term kryptonite is related to superman.

The term used to designate any surviving fragment of the exploded planet Krypton [so original right?], home world of Superman.

There are five distinct varieties of kryptonite (green, red, gold, blue, and white), the first three of which are toxic to Superman.

Green kryptonite, the only variety potentially fatal to Superman [since I am not a fan, I didn't even know there was something that was fatal to superman], induces lassitude and inertia followed by death if not removed in time from Superman's presence.

Red kryptonite inflicts bizarre and unpredictable - albeit temporary and nonfatal - symptoms, as when it divides Superman into twins or transforms him into an infant or a giant ant.

Gold kryptonite would permanently rob Superman of his super-powers were he ever to be exposed to its radiations.

Source


The lyrics of the song -

I took a walk around the world
To ease my troubled mind
I left my body laying somewhere
In the sands of time
But I watched the world float
To the dark side of the moon

I feel there is nothing I can do, yeah

I watched the world float
To the dark side of the moon
After all I knew it had to be
Something to do with you
I really don’t mind what happens now and then
As long as you’ll be my friend at the end

If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I’m alive and well, will you be
There a-holding my hand
I’ll keep you by my side
With my superhuman might
Kryptonite

You called me strong, you called me weak,
But still your secrets I will keep
You took for granted all the times
I never let you down
You stumbled in and bumped your head,
If not for me then you'd be dead
I picked you up and put you back
On solid ground

If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I’m alive and well,
Will you be there a-holding my hand
I’ll keep you by my side
With my superhuman might
Kryptonite

If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I’m alive and well, will you be there
Holding my hand
I’ll keep you by my side
With my superhuman might
Kryptonite
Yeah!!

If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I'm alive and well,
Will you be there a-holding my hand
I'll keep you by my side
With my superhuman might
Kryptonite
Yeah!!

What the...

So how stupid can someone be?

VERY VERY STUPID.

Last Friday I am walking home from the bus stop and this guy on the street says something to me. I'm thinking it's one of those, I came from out of town, got robbed and have no money left to go back sort of thing. So I didn't understand what the idiot said the first time so I said what and he mumbled something again. So I just said I don't have time and started walking off without knowing what he said. After about 10 steps he over takes me and again says something (I still can't understand what he is saying). So I say I can't understand what you are saying. So guess what? He proclaims his love for me and asks me what I think.

What a dumb ass. If it was a joke or bet or something it's still okay. If he was serious, I think I haven't met a more stupid person in my life. (I had noticed him at the station I get off the evening before too). Anyway I mean this guy was like a low class illiterate from UP or something (no offense intended to anyone). I mean how can anyone like that be retarded enough to even talk to a well educated, very well out South Mumbai girl. I mean it's even alright if you are just saying you are in love, but then asking what I think about that. Jeezzzz how dumb is that.

I am actually pissed that I just walked off. I should have embarrassed the hell out of the guy. Of course there weren't too many people around but still.

Anyway not only am I shocked that the guy was so dumb, I am even pissed that someone can go and say such things to some one.

And yes of course I DO NOT believe in love at first sight. The whole idea is so unbelievable ridiculous.

Anyway I am sure there won't be a next time for something like this, but if there is, the guy is so going to regret thinking of the idea.

3 days to go...

Well and I complete 2 years of work life.

I was always worried that I would never find a job that I would be good at and was so scared at my 'future prospects' after college and especially after 1 year of lukhagiri (giving MBA entrance exams).

Well I am pretty decent at what I do and I do believe that I have qualities that would make it easy for me to at least find a decent job in the future. So I am less worried.


Of course congratulations to my company too - It survived with me in it for so long...

So annoying...

I can't seem to sync my msn nicks on my home and office computer.

Keep checking the properties and everything seems alright, so can't figure what's going on.

'Who says "Nothing is Impossible", I have done nothing in the past few days and believe me IT IS possible...

[Hehe so I got a comment before I could write the post. Anyway finally you commented Sachin. Was wondering if that would ever happen lol. Anyway will continue this post as it would have been Good point though Sachin and maybe some day I will try to write a post about how we sometimes do things without realising we are doing thing and the value of the same]

I hate forwards, not always but most of the time.
Everyone once in a while though, there are some really cool ones that come my way. This line came to me as an SMS and I couldn't help but laugh a little. It's the kind of thing I would say.

Okay fine....I admit it...it's actually the kind of thing I would do - NOTHING :)

That's how life should be man. No pressures, no deadlines, no nonsense (yes I know I would miss it but I would still choose life as a bum over life as a ummm wannabe hot shot executive). Of course I don't believe that living such a life for a long period of time is possible. But they do say 'nothing is impossible'.....

What Clouds...

So apart from lightening and thunder the only other good thing about the monsoons are the clouds. What beautiful colours and formations. Sometimes such great contrast - in size, shape, colour, movement.

Hopefully once I get my camera to work properly, I will put up some pictures on my photo blog.

Also got to see 2 rainbows in 3 days. How cool is that? Got one decent picture of a rainbow too. They are so difficult to capture cause most cameras aren't good enough to get the details.

Well anyway I enjoyed the clouds the last 2 days. Once the rains are here in full force, even seeing the clouds will be too much of a task. Either it will be raining or it will be so dark that it won't matter.

It wasn't a pre-monsoon shower :(

It rained again today. *sob* the monsoons are here *sob*.

I hate the rains.

The only thing that was totally kick ass today was that the day changed from a bright sunny day to dark stormy kind of skies in a matter of 5 minutes. The dark clouds just rolled in so quickly...it was totallyyyyy amazing.

:)

Yay Yay Yay

Yuck Yuck Yuck...

Well so we had pre-monsoon showers on the 31st. Nothing about them seemed like pre-monsoon showers though.

Anyway the yay yay yay is for the thunder and lightning that happened that night.

Yuck yuck yuck was obviously because of the rains and everything being wet and mucky and dirrrrty.

God the rains are going to be so painful.

Btw have I ever mentioned - I hate the rains?

Insomnia...

Fantastic Song - Old but still fantastic

Happy Birthday Amol...

So Amol gets mentioned for obvious reasons on the blog...

[For those who might not know, my tryst with blogging started thanks to Amol (indirectly of course)]

Well Amol (since you will be one of about 2 or 3 people who will actually read this, I might as well write in this manner- I think grammatically it is called first person?), it is good to see that you get new friends and fans as you get older.

Of course like I always say - you should still go by your first instinct :p

Anyway enough of all that. Seriously - have a great year ahead.

R.I.P.

Shraddha
My sister's friend. My friend's sister. My friend.
Totally bindas, always smiling, confident, strong, young....I am sad we couldn't do MCom II together.
You will be missed...

Sadho Re (Yeh Murdo Ka Gaon) by Agnee

The song is brilliant and the video is even more brilliant.

You have to check out this video (one of the best I have seen this year) -



You can also get the video and some information on Agnee at MTV - http://www.mtvindia.com/mtv/music/features/07/04/agnee/index.php

Can't put my finger on why I so totally love the song.

The lyrics are great - even though a lot of people think they are lame or corny. I think Kabir was a great poet and nothing about Sadho Re (the poem) is bad.

I mean just the line Yeh Murdo Ka Gaon has so much impact. I think it very aptly describes us and our world.

The music sounds different which is great.

The video like I said it totally mind blowing. That little girl is so fantastic. The best part of the video is the moment her ice cream falls and she starts crying. It could be that I am reading it wrongly but the man banging into her and making her drop her ice-cream is the final trigger to everything that has built up already inside her with everything around. She wouldn't have cried if something hadn't affected her personally I believe. Which is the case with all of us. We only really act / react when we go through something personally.

Happy Watching!!!

[So the reason I am posting about the song twice is that I realised that people are searching for the song and coming to my blog but since my blog hasn't had a deep crawl that exact post doesn't show up and lots of people find content they aren't interested in]

Yeh Dooriyan

Yeh Dooriyan
Ab hai kahan

Yeh faasle
Na darmiyan

Badla badla sa hai zamana
Khamoshiyan bhi hai gumshuda


The lyrics as I hear them. The song is also called Shakira Ve I think.

[Don't know if it's legal to put up this YouTube video of the song but the video is super cool too. Have a look]



Fantasticcccc song.

?

You gotta pay the price...

If you are going to play a game, you need be careful when makes the moves you know you shouldn't make, because if your strategy back-fires, there will be a heavy price to pay.


The thought came first and then I got a very relevant 'narratable' example. I was watching a TV show a few months after the London train bombing, which revolved around how Muslims were being discriminated against in the UK, etc.
There was this lady who they interviewed. I can't remember details now but she either headed some organisation to safe guard Muslim interests or is a lawyer. They should her speak at a gathering and she stated that ALL of the current day Muslim woes are cause by the British. She named a few places / incidents, the history of which I don't know, and she also named the problems in Kashmir as having their roots seeped in British mistakes.
When I thought about it, she had a point. If the British hadn't followed a 'Divide and Rule' policy, I wonder if Partition would have happened. I have my doubts. So technically she was right. Now imagine if all the Muslims or even just all the fanatical Muslims started to believe this, I think the UK would be the first country to be nuked.

The British followed a strategy to get on top which was wrong - ethically I mean, and I think that some day they are going to pay the price. Till date we (the sub-continent) are paying the price but I think the tables will turn, and then a lot of people will not know where to run.

Anyway I think that doing some thing wrong for whatever reason, is a bad idea, always has been and always will be.

I am the worst 1st class (train) passanger

So I don't think anyone who has a first class pass would want to jump to a second class...but I do.

Why?

Cause today was the second time there were freakin mice running around the compartment. I mean the worst I saw in a second class compartment was a cockroach once in 8 - 9 months. Here I see mice twice on different day within a 2 week period.

So I have a friend who travels by first class and she says she has never seen a mouse in the train and I have another friend who has seen a mouse even in 2nd Class. I think it's pathetic. I mean yuckkkk.

And the worse part is, some of the women on the first day (it was much crowded) were so cool about the whole thing. As if the mice were like their own children running around. I'm assuming seeing mice / rats for some of them is common but it's not common for me and it's not acceptable by me to sit in a compartment where there are these little things running in and out from under the seats.

I sure as hell am not renewing my 1st Class Pass next month. The crowded second class is good enough.

What a waste...

So you want to release your new phone in the market. It's USP you are touting to be 'thump music'. You rope in the guy who is considered the coolest / hottest dancer in the country.

And then....

You give him the most ridiculous dance steps in the ad. Perfect.

I mean everyone else in the ad (Sony Ericcson) has cooler dance steps. The only time I think Hritik was impressive in the ad is when he says at the end of the ad 'The Thump is here'.

He is even dressed horribly.

If all this was purposely done, I can't understand why. It would be a silly strategy.

Yeh Murdoh Ka Gaon...

Sadho Reeeee Yeh Murdo Ka Gaon....yeh murdoh ka gaon.

Fantastic song. It's by a group called Agnee. Never heard of them before. Apparently the song is one of Kabirs. Tried to google it but didn't get relevant results.

If you would like a listen you can go to the bottom of the mtv page talking about the video release and click the 'click here' link.

Shame on us...

We are such a great nation are we not?

Families of 2,823 victims of the 9/11 attacks got 1 million dollars each.
Families of the over 20,000 victims of the Bhopal Gas Leak got 1,250 dollars.
[Figures from Greenpeace]

This post is in no way trying to compare 9/11 and the Bhopal Gas Tragedy. My point is about how we see the value of a life. It is not that the BGT victims couldn't have got more compensation. God knows they should have got more. But we Indians are super ineffectual when it comes to big, important things. All we do is make great speeches....

On the terrace...

So I have the company laptop...and it's with a data card...so I am sitting on my terrace and blogging :D

The technology of today is just marvellous and I believe the best is still to come...

I don't believe in the whole theory of machines taking over etc. While the instinct for survival has always existed and will always exist, I don't believe that for the next couple of centuries at least, we will see AI that will display such a strong survival need that it will start destroying even humans to 'live'. These kind of ideas make for great film scripts but I think that's where it ends.

While learning by seeing (I forget the scientific term - but basically learning behaviour and replicating, historical storage of data so as to adapting to environments etc) will most definitely be the way we program our machines to learn, I don't think you can fill 'evil' into a program / code etc.

www.leelounge.com/forum

This site doesn't exist anymore but I am not killing the post because this post happened on May 1st 2007 when social media wasn't even something people were talking about.

The Lee Lounge Forum

I believe that branded communities and forums are going to be the biggest online sponsorship activities soon.

Communities are big and so is user generated content. People love expression themselves, love believing that what they do is seen by other people and either appreciated or debated.

Yahoo Answers works the same way. Actually Yahoo Answers might be changing the whole search industry. Imagine if you had a super specific query and knew that any resource on the web wouldn't help cause you needed a person solution. What could you do in the past? Nothing much except consult and expert offline and pay him if you really needed the info. Now all you have to do is post a question on Yahoo Answers and you might get just as good a reply from your expert consultant for free.

YouTube is the if you ask me, the most popular user generated content website. I do wonder how long it will remain free and I also wonder what kind of monetization Google will be able to extract from it in terms of advertising revenues. In my opinion, it will always stay free because it being free is what bring it so many visitors and users. More the visitors, more the advertisers will spend.

Sunsilk Gang Of Girls is another example of how a Brand is targeting its Target Audience but in a unique, non boring way. What is interesting though is that they have actually found a new TA thanks to the GoG initiative. Their target is now younger women, who work, spend more on beauty products, etc.

Anyway whats interesting is that you can have a free for all which is on the likes of GOG (with the exception of gender that is) or you can have those on the likes of the Lee Lounge forum that cater to a specific segment of urban youth, interested in fashion, movies, music and everything that's cool.

Idiots

When I meet people who are more stupid than I am, it annoys me rather than making me happy...

When will this work end?...

Never...

She mustn't be more than 7 years old...

The one thing I hate about travelling by train is seeing children (and also old, blind and cripple people) trying to earn some money in the trains.

Lots of kids hop from one train to another trying to sell books, safety pins, rubber bands and anything else that women would buy on the train.

Anyway my nick is for this cute little girl. She mustn't be more than 7 years old. I can't help but think that her life is ruined. It's so sad that her childhood is being lived trying to earn a living.
The same for all the kids doing think. all the kids on the streets, all those working as domestic help. What do they have to look forward to in life? None of them deserve this sort of life. And if they do then none of us (read me) deserve the kind of life we live.

It's sad and I wish things would change.

Happy Birthday foooooooooool...

The foooooool is none other than -

1) our driver in Manila.

2) the woman who insists she is stupid NOW because of me - which I must accept is a very smart excuse (you see I slammed a door shut bang onto her head - ya even I don't know how I am still alive - I think she was too stunned at that moment and then later too much in pain and then later totally affected and therefore wasn't herself. So I guess I just saved myself)

3) mother of one, grandmother of many.

4) the only person who can make me feel guilty as hell and actually DOES it. Lol okay so she's not that nasty but still she is a little evil.

5) one half of the most perverted female duo I know

6) the only woman I know who wants to write about her fan following even though there were only FOUR guys :p

Haha so not everything on this blog is the truth ....

but the above is all true...okay kidding. I do love my life.

Happyyyyy Birthdayyyyy Nisha.

P.S. - I may not know your real age but I do know when you are giving me some bullshit number :p

[Key in case you are reading - getting featured on my blog isn't that tough - you just have to pay me the right amount lol. Well I promise if I don't call you on your birthday I will just call to catch up - which is a lot seeing as how stingy I am]

Woh Anjabee

Whatttttttttttttttt a fab song.

I totally love it.

The music is good.
The lyrics are good.
The singers are decent.
The video isn't bad either.

What more do you need?


Song is from the movie The Train - Some lines must never be crossed. Interesting name I think.

The lyrics -

Waisa koi mujhko mil gaya hai, aisa kiya hai
jisse dekh kar main bhool sari duniya
woh woh woh ajnabi woh ajnabi
jo dekhen door se dekhoon main
usko bhi,o usko bhi ab sab kuch bhool ke
dhadkan dhadkan ya sanson mein
raatein raatein ya khabon mein
sapne sapne koi to hai
yeh bata doon main usse
shaame shaame ya subh ho mein
shaamil shaamil ko har pal mein
har dum har dum woh baaton mein
mere rahi hai kahin woh
woh ajnabi woh ajnabi

The priorities of secondary needs...

Well was reading the Principles of Marketing (and like always ended up only finishing one page) and came across and interesting page thankfully which spoke about how even though we (human beings) have needs, each need is divided into sub-need in a way. And the product a person buys would depends on not only the main need that the product fulfills but also the number of sub-needs that the product can fulfill.

Kotler put down and example of detergents (P & G). While the main aim of any clothes washing soap is to get clothes clean, there are other functions that a detergent can perform. And a prospective buyer looks at these. For instance, some people want fragrance in their detergent. Others look for bleach, while others want fabric softener, others would give a lot of importance to price, etc. Thus depending on what other functions a user would want from a detergent, they would purchase that relevant product from the market.

Thus (at least in my mind this is how I see it) there is a priority of secondary needs that a product must fulfill.

Back to work...

:(

Well so technically I was only off for 7 days from work (12 days including weekends and holidays). And even though I was studying for my exams and not chilling I realised I miss the life of being a bum.

No deadlines, no headaches, no responsibilities, no pressure.
Woke up when I like (though I had to wake up before 7 on the days of my papers)
Slept when I like (though I ended up sleeping around 3 many nights because that's what happens when you study last minute).
Watched TV at odd hours of the day.
Sat around in my PJ's
Sat on my terrace when it was nice and pleasant.
At hot lunch at the dining table.
Sat around alone instead of having 15 people bearing down on me at one time.
Dreamed about my exams being over and me chilling.

Anyway back to the real world tomorrow.

Dead City

Now I don't party so when I talk about a night out it means being on the road after 10.

So anyway I am out for dinner today and the whole place is empty. At least their AC room (udipi restaurant of sorts). And this is around 8:45 which is close to peak time.

We get out at 9:30 and the roads are as good as deserted.

Go to another place to eat (variety is the spice of life) and that place is pretty empty too. And it's a SATURDAY night. So we get out of there at around 10:20 odd and again notice that the roads are so empty.

And I'm thinking to myself that for normal Bombay Saturday nights standards this is like being a Ghost Town.

Dead City....?

Jaane kaise kab kahaan chal pada yeh silsila...

:)

It's a line from a song - Jaine Kaise from Raqeeb

What goes around, comes back around

Oh yeah...


Anyway the nick NOW cause I have been listening to Justin Timberlakes 'What goes around...comes around'. I like it. I'm no die hard fan of Justin Timberlakes but do like some of his songs.

Will I be missed?...

So just to clarity, I am not being self-centered in THIS post - really.

Well I have my exams going on. Therefore have taken 7 days off from work. It made me wonder if work would be more chaotic without me there. It will be a little bit I am sure seeing how we 'seniors' are needed to be around not just to help get routine work done but also to help troubleshoot any problems anyone has.

Anyway I realised that if I were at a 'lower level', I would have loved the feeling of being missed and believing that the world was falling apart cause I wasn't there to help hold it up. But now being at a higher level I feel the need to be totally dispensable. I want that my juniors are so good that they can totally do without me and can actually do what I would normally do (outside their job function), at least to some level.

I think the success of any management person has to be how well he / she actually trained his / her team members to handle their job and also crisis situations. Many people may not agree and maybe I'll be proved wrong in the future but for now this is my core belief. Sure I am a long way off in getting my team into being the best bunch around but I am hoping we will get there.

What a loser...

How many times have you looked into the mirror and said - what a loser?

Happens not as often as it should in my case. But anyway most of the time it's because I have a plan of action but I don't follow through on it - mostly for reasons of being too afraid of the consequences that will follow my actions.

I got fooled - and howwwww...

Ya ya I fell for an April Fools Joke but it was no ordinary joker.

I fell for Gmails - Gmail Paper Joke.

I am contemplating suing Google for all the embarrassment it cause me cause I actually went around telling people about it. Just cause one is the biggest advertising company in the world or whatever, it doesn't mean one can do whatever they like. 'Do No Evil' my ass.

To read my whole advertising perspective on it, you can check out my post on my PPC Blog.

Khwab hai toh mujko na utha - jhooth hai toh mujko na batah...

Whatttttttttttttttt a songgggggg.

I can't stop listening to it.

So since it was my nick I got a couple of people asking me if I was in love hehe.

Love these two lines cause they resonate so well in every situation that seems like it too good to be true - Khwab hai toh mujko na utha (If this is a dream don't wake me up). Jhooth hai toh mukjo na batah (If it's a lie don't tell me).

The song is from the movie - Ek Chalis Ki Last Local.

The Indian Team doesn't disappoint....

The cricket team and their World Cup result - doesn't disappoint me at least .

I was sitting back and thinking about why it is that I am neither sad, angry, upset, or feeling any other emotion, at hearing that India is out of the World Cup and I realised that it's because I didn't expect anything out of the Indian Team. Of course it is shameful that we didn't make it to the top 8 but seeing the way we have been playing, we didn't deserve to.

The faces of the men in blue should be blackened and they should be taken around the on donkey back with a garland of shoes round their neck. (Don't remember from where the description or the picture is but I have always associated it with shamefulness).

Being in the 'marketing' line myself though, I couldn't help but think about the kind of investments companies would have made in buying air time, creating special endorsements, having special promotions, etc all surrounding the world cup. It will end up being such a big flop show for all of them.

And like I always say - the most tragic part of the whole deal will be that we all will forgive and forget and the team will perform the same way in the next World Cup....

The Cab Ride...

So I get out at my station at 9:15 p.m. today and it's already super late but the best part is that there is no bus and the cabs are not going to toward where I live, I over heard a few people asking before I got to the cab line. Anyway I also start asking cause there is nothing better to do. As luck has it, a cabbie agrees and I'm getting in when this girl or young woman asks if I can drop her off on the way. I say 'ya sure' and we get in and she says 'there is this one lady who is trying since a really long time to get a cab and she isn't able to, shes going where you are headed, if you don't mind I'll ask her to join.' I am like okay sure.

Now while I like the idea of saving on petrol consumption and money, I am not comfortable with traveling with strangers like that.

Anyway what is so interesting about the cab ride is that in 10 minutes I actually learned this girls name, what she did for a living (designer), which area she worked in, where she was staying, that she was from out of town, how she finds traveling a pain. She got to know the area I live, where I work - company and location, that I work till pretty late, the location of where my office was previously, my preference of trains, etc.

Obviously there is some things that won't be surface level but for instance, her inviting the lady who desperately wanted to get to where I was going, revealed something about this girl to me. The fact that I didn't accept her money or the money of the other lady (I would have paid the full amount any which way) must have made her form some opinion about that too.

We meet to many people in our day to day life, either in ordinary or extra-ordinary situations, and all can have some impact on our life, if we like. For instance, I couldn't help but think what it must be like to be single, working, living in a hostel but listening to that girl or rather young lady cause even though she looked 20, I am assuming she must have been at least 23 - 24.

I also couldn't help thinking the relief the other woman must have felt to be getting to where she had to go fast. Also the happiness she might have had for getting a free ride (she could afford a taxi but not everyday, if you know what I mean). So I impacted her life for 15 minutes today more than she did mine but there is still a lesson there for me to learn - to try and give people 'lifts' if they 'seem alright'.

Pyar ki yeh kahani suno...

It's a song.

What's interesting though is that a few people actually asked me to tell them the story.

Anyway the song is from the movie Honeymoon Travels Pvt. Ltd. I thought it would be good cause it had K K Menon and Sandhya Mridul in it and those two usually do good 'hatke' films. Anyway heard bad reviews so will only watch it on VCD.

Don't know why I like the song so much, it's not the usual kind of music I would listen to. Anyway it's a cool song. Check it out if you can. Also Resham has a review on it.

The customer isn't dumb - she's your boss...

Was reading the Womens Day Special of Economic Times a week or two ago and came across an article on how marketers need to realise how their target audience is changing. It started by saying David Ogilvy once wrote - 'The customer isn't dumb-she's your wife'. The writer (don't remember his name right now) was talking about how women are changing their world today - they are independant, confident, career oriented etc. Therefore there is a need to adapt and change marketing strategies. So he spoke about how Fair & Lovely use to show ads of a girl getting rejected by a prospective groom in an arranged marriage situation because she was dark but today all these fairness creams are either showing women becoming fair and having guys falling all over or getting the jobs of their dreams.
There were a few more examples but what was also interesting was how the writer said that the entrance of television actually lead to such a strong change in how women are percieved and how women actually did change thank to tv. He specifically mentioned Rajni and Lataji as turning points. Here were women characters who were crafted as being smart, self-confident, and ready to fight for what they believed.
Anyway I found the article very interesting. It made tons of sense too because it so real and 'obvious'.
Of course the article ended with the writer saying - If David Ogilvy was writing a book today, he might have said - The customer isn't dumb - she's your boss.

Change

Inevitable

Conferences and Seminars

Attended my first ever work related conference on the 16th of March - The Digital Marketing Conference 2007.
Since it's work related, the details can be found on my PPC related blog.

Why I do mention it though is because it was very interesting. While the discussions and speakers weren't as good as expected, it got great insight into a lot of things. Sometimes things get you thinking on a track you didn't even know existed.

Anyway what I was also excited about was that I went up to a few 'big shots' and spoke to them. No that anyone would really remember me, but I got a feel of what networking would be like. Also realised that for those of us who aren't talented enough, talking with the speakers is easier because there is some foundation for starting a conversation. Either building on something they said, asking a question or opposing what they said.

Also realised that there is a need to bring more 'clients' or prospective clients into such conferences as a majority of the audience was people from agencies, who already know about the business and didn't learn anything super. Advertising such event properly is very important.

On the whole it was a super experience. Next time though, I wish more people would talk in a lot more detail about mobile marketing.

A Suitable Boy...

1474 pages

Investments 2...

Ya now this one is about real money investments. [I had to do a little tax planning this year - still can't believe I am in the tax payers bracket]. Anyway Mutual Funds it was but my Dad generally bought out the topic of Life Insurance since the broker was a little free today (poor chap was working on a Sunday - but this is the kind of advantage you get of having strong relationships with the people around you. He didn't mind coming to us at a time that was convenient to us).

Now LIC has these schemes that range from 10 year to 25 year. You keep paying a fixed level of premium. I totally dreaded the idea of getting an insurance policy mainly because of the duration of these schemes. Sure I can afford an investment of a couple of lakhs over the next couple of years but the idea of spreading that money out over even 10 years is a horrible idea. The agent was suggesting a 15 year plan and I sure as hell don't want to work for another 15 years. At least not the way I am working right now. I don't want a salary. I either want money from a personal business or through smart investing. Of course for both I need funds and expertise which will only accumulate over some time but the idea of having to work for so long is just horrible. I am already dreaming of vacation in Phuket (staying at a 5 star hotels) sipping mocktails on a beach.
It's the same though that's not letting me think of getting a home loan or even moving out or going abroad so soon. I will have to keep working to cover up those expenses.

Anyway we all keep dreaming of the life we can't have (right away). Lets hope that I find a job I love and that it pays well.

So sitting with the broker 'uncle' today I decided that will do some more investing in the next financial year and do it before July or so, instead of having my money rot in a savings account at the bank. He mentioned some good investment funds and I think I should be the proud owner of a few soon. Of course there is risk involved cause they are all linked to the equity markets but I am greedy and want as much money as I can get, fast....

Investments...

No this post isn't about the stock markets.

My sis and I were at a book fair and she was talking about this book that she really liked but didn't pick up because it cost Rs.700. I told her "Why is it that you look at 700 bucks as a stand alone price or as money compared to something cheaper. Look at it as an investment. If it will help you with the course you are doing, you should pick it up."

There are so many things we do but don't realise they are really investments. A lot of 'unproductive' work also could be an investment because we don't really look at the benefits of such activities over a longer duration.

I could watch a TV show and think it was just entertainment but I could actually learn from it. For instance while watching Lost, I kept trying to figure if they were writing the story as they went along or whether they had the main plot already put down and was just adding new loops to it. I personally think it's the former. But it is still interesting to see how the story keep turning and how different things gain importance at different points in time. Also I learned some slang (don't know if that's any help cause I sure as hell won't be young enough to talk in slang when I am in the US - if ever) and learned how characters need to be.

Of course most people don't have that kind of perspective cause they might not be interested in such details. But still I don't think it would be a total waste to watch TV for example. It also help hold conversations. Not with intellectual who think the idiot box is for idiots but with 'normal' people sure you can.

Anyway Tom read my nick and said 'investments you say, I'm listening' lol had to tell him it wasn't about 'those kind' of investments. He was the only who very aptly concluded what should be considered as investments - according to him an investment - 'only works if it'll be worth more.' Which brings us to 2 important points -
1) How do you measure returns and
2) What time frame are you looking at.

He concluded that everything you do then has some returns to it even if it is to satisfy a silly urge but you should know why it is you are doing what you are doing which is brilliant cause it just means that you should be conscious at all times of what you are doing and why you are doing what you are doing.

I do wish I was smart when I was younger like some of these online friends of mine...

Anyway so next time you do something, figure out if it was a good investment (of your time, money, efforts, emotions, etc) or not.

Tired...

Ever had those days when you were tired and couldn't figure out why?

Practice...

Just gave my prelim exams and I am glad I did. They weren't important cause a lot of students didn't even turn up but I am glad I had at least a 10% seriousness about them.

Apart from the fact that I got to figure that a lot of the stuff I have to study, I have already studied sometime in the past. And apart from realising that our economics portion is horrible and that I need to open my book and at least get through reading a complete chapter. Any chapter.

The most important thing I realised was the importance of practicing. I haven't written a complete exam in years now and I had forgotten the importance of time, the importance of being neat, the importance of writing a lot, the importance of good quality dhap.

I wouldn't have thought about any of these things unless I had given this exam. Just like old days, my 'answer 1' usually took more than the amount of time that was needed to be allocated to it. This sounds small but I am sure at the end of the day, just keeping this in mind will help me score at least 4 -5 points more. Small things make big differences at times.

So practice is good (if not necessary). I look forward to practicing stuff more...

Contd. from previous post

In case you are interesting in the history of earthquakes -

17 July 2006:

A 7.7 magnitude undersea earthquake triggers a tsunami that strikes a 200km (125-mile) stretch of the southern coast of Java, killing more than 650 people on the Indonesian island.

27 May 2006:

Nearly 5,000 people die when a magnitude 6.2 quake hits the Indonesian island of Java, devastating the city of Yogyakarta and surrounding areas.

1 April 2006:

Seventy people are killed and some 1,200 injured when an earthquake measuring 6.0 strikes a remote region of western Iran.

8 October 2005:

An earthquake measuring 7.6 strikes northern Pakistan and the disputed Kashmir region, killing more than 73,000 people and leaving millions homeless.

28 March 2005:

About 1,300 people are killed in an 8.7 magnitude quake off the coast of the Indonesian island of Nias, west of Sumatra.

22 February 2005:

Hundreds die in a 6.4 magnitude quake centred in a remote area near Zarand in Iran's Kerman province.

26 December 2004:

Hundreds of thousands are killed across Asia when an earthquake measuring 8.9 triggers sea surges that spread across the region.

24 February 2004:

At least 500 people die in an earthquake which strikes towns on Morocco's Mediterranean coast.

26 December 2003:

More than 26,000 people are killed when an earthquake destroys the historic city of Bam in southern Iran.

21 May 2003:

Algeria suffers its worst earthquake in more than two decades. More than 2,000 people die and more than 8,000 are injured in a quake felt across the sea in Spain.

1 May 2003:

More than 160 people are killed, including 83 children in a collapsed dormitory, in south-eastern Turkey.

24 February 2003:

More than 260 people die and almost 10,000 homes are destroyed in Xinjiang region, in western China.

31 October 2002:

Italy is traumatised by the loss of an entire class of children, killed in the southern village of San Giuliano di Puglia when their school building collapses on them.

26 January 2001:

An earthquake measuring magnitude 7.9 devastates much of Gujarat state in north-western India, killing nearly 20,000 people and making more than a million homeless. Bhuj and Ahmedabad are among the towns worst hit.

12 November 1999:

Around 400 people die when an earthquake measuring 7.2 on the Richter scale strikes Ducze, in north-west Turkey.

21 September 1999:

Taiwan is hit by a quake measuring 7.6 that kills nearly 2,500 people and causes damage to every town on the island.

17 August 1999:

An magnitude 7.4 earthquake rocks the Turkish cities of Izmit and Istanbul, leaving more than 17,000 dead and many more injured.

30 May 1998:

Northern Afghanistan is hit by a major earthquake, killing 4,000 people.

May 1997:

More than 1,600 killed in Birjand, eastern Iran, in an earthquake of magnitude 7.1.

27 May 1995:

The far eastern island of Sakhalin is hit by a massive earthquake, measuring 7.5, which claims the lives of 1,989 Russians.

17 January 1995:

The Hyogo quake hits the city of Kobe in Japan, killing 6,430 people.

30 September 1993:

About 10,000 villagers are killed in western and southern India.

21 June 1990:

Around 40,000 people die in a tremor in the northern Iranian province of Gilan.

7 December 1988:

An earthquake measuring 6.9 on the Richter scale devastates north-west Armenia, killing 25,000 people.

19 September 1985:

Mexico City is shaken by a huge earthquake which razes buildings and kills 10,000 people.

28 July 1976:

The Chinese city of Tangshan is reduced to rubble in a quake that claims at least 250,000 lives.

23 December 1972:

Up to 10,000 people are killed in the Nicaraguan capital Managua by an earthquake that measures 6.5 on the Richter scale. The devastation caused by the earthquake was blamed on badly built high-rise buildings that easily collapsed.

31 May 1970:

An earthquake high in the Peruvian Andes triggers a landslide burying the town of Hungary and killing 66,000 people.

26 July 1963:

An earthquake measuring 6.9 on the Richter scale strikes the Macedonian capital of Skopje killing 1,000 and leaving 100,000 homeless.

22 May 1960:

The world's strongest recorded earthquake devastates Chile, with a reading of 9.5 on the Richter scale. A tsunami 30ft (10m) high eliminates entire villages in Chile and kills 61 hundreds of miles away in Hawaii.

1 September 1923:

The Great Kanto earthquake, with its epicentre just outside Tokyo, claims the lives of 142,800 people in the Japanese capital.

18 April 1906:

San Francisco is hit by a series of violent shocks which last up to a minute. Between 700 and 3,000 people die either from collapsing buildings or in the subsequent fire.

Source : BBC News

Also find out how earthquake work and about the working of other natural disasters.

What's up with all the earthquakes?...

Another earthquake (measuring 6.3) rocked Indonesia yesterday (March 6th). It hit the island of Sumatra and close to 70 people are dead.
Indonesia sits on the Pacific Ring of Fire.

Indonesia is already having a pretty bad year. Below are the disasters that have hit Indonesia in the last few years -

March 6: An earthquake strikes Sumatra Island, killing at least 70 people and damaging hundreds of buildings.

- March 3: Landslides triggered by days of heavy rain kill at least 40 people in eastern Indonesia.

- Feb. 1: Rivers in the capital, Jakarta, burst their banks, submerging parts of the city in water up to 12 feet deep, killing 57 and displacing 450,000.

- Dec. 29, 2006: A ferry sinks in a storm, killing more than 400 people in the Java Sea.

- Dec. 23, 2006: Heavy rain touches off floods that kill more than 100 people and displace over 400,000 on Sumatra.

- July 17, 2006: An earthquake triggers a tsunami off Java island's southern coast, killing at least 600 people.

- June 19, 2006: Floods and mud flows kill up to 300 people in southern Sulawesi province.

- May 27, 2006: An earthquake in central Java kills at least 5,800 people and injures more than 36,000.

- May 2006: A series of explosions spew hot ash down the slopes of Mount Merapi, forcing 15,000 villagers to flee.

- May 2006: A mud eruption at a drilling shaft on Java displaces more than 11,000 people and inundates villages and factories, spewing a million oil drums of muck a day.

- Jan. 4, 2006: Some 200 people are killed in a landslide on Java.

- March 28, 2005: More than 900 people are killed and tens of thousands are left homeless when an earthquake hits Nias, Banyak and Simeulue islands off the coast of Sumatra.

- Dec. 26, 2004: An earthquake sets off a tsunami that kills more than 160,000 people in Indonesia, mostly in Aceh province on Sumatra.

Source : Guardian Unlimited

Recent Indonesian quakes -

6 March 2007: Magnitude 6.3 quake hits Sumatra, at least 70 dead

18 December 2006: Mag 5.7 quake hits Sumatra, seven dead

17 July 2006: Tsunami from Mag 7.7 quake off Java kills 500

27 May 2006: Mag 6.2 quake near Yogyakarta kills 5,000

26 December 2004: Tsunami from Mag 9.1 quake kills 130,000 in Sumatra

Source : BBC News

Exams are so damn easy to give...

As compared to other things. Sometimes I think exams are more easy than day to day things we do.
Papers are predictable. There is ample choice. You study and you get the deserving results.
Real life isn't so cool.

A Holi Dream

Well I don't remember my dreams usually but many years ago on Holi I saw the most vivid dream and one that I actually remembered. Now though some details of it has been forgotten but I still hold it dearly cause I actually remembered it. Please note that this was way before the Tsunami and the 26/7 flooding in Mumbai. It was on Holi and that's why I call it a Holi Dream

Anyway it's was obviously caused because the children in the next building were making a lot of noise while playing on their building terrace. I realised because the first thing I did is actually go to the balcony window and look out lol.

So none of this will make sense unless I give a few details of my balcony view. I don't live next to the sea but because we are on a small hill sort of thing, and by living on the top floor we get a view of the sea from our balcony windows (West). Because of top floor advantage we don't have a building right outside our window but there are a few taller building slightly out. Hate them cause they actually do block some of the view. The buildings right next to out are one and three floors below ours.

So anyway my dream starts with a storm (ya I was so loving it) but the funny thing is we were actually sleeping through it. All we did was close all the windows. The rain was first lashing at the windows. It kept pouring all night and the sea level started rising. All the fishermen got back to shore and swore that the tide would come in and we would all be wasted away so they started building an embankment to keep the sea out. Obviously it didn't work as the water kept rising and started over flowing. The good folk then just ran cause obviously being on the coast wasn't the wisest thing. Anyway the water level keep rising and with it come big waves. The waves are so big that they start hitting our windows. Obviously the area is getting flooded but the water isn't high enough to affect us.
So I wake up in the morning (in my dream) because I hear lots of voices and I look out and look straight down at the building where all he noise is coming from (slightly to the left). There are people on the terrace walking around with their pants rolled up, filling buckets of water and throwing the water off the side of the building. My eyes then move down to the streets where there is about 3 - 4 feet of water (all dirty brown water) just collected and not going anywhere.

So I'm standing there thinking 'wow some storm' and move my gaze up to see the sea. And what do I see - one (or maybe two) of the tall buildings is GONE and in it's place is standing this huge ship. I even remember it was blue, grey and white and had Damania written on it. I think I had seen the picture of that ship in the newspaper a few days before the dream. And I am thinking there is no way this is happening. And if feels so real because I woke up right.

Haha so anyway I ACTUALLY wake up and run out to the balcony and look out and it's a normal day and the kids on the neighbouring terrace are having fun with their 'pichkaris', water balloons and colours.

What a dream. Not because it was so crazy but because it was so vivid.

Happy Holi

The good ol' days - except they weren't so good...

Yup that's correct

Ya I'm failing Eco again...

Ya that's what is going to happen. I wonder if I will even write as much as the two sides I did in the last exam.

Anyway this whole thought got me thinking about how discipline is so important. Sure these are internal college exams and don't count for much but it's a wrong reason not to study hard enough. The fact that I signed up for the course, I should have some dedication toward it. I could always say that I am so much busier with work and that it needs more of my time etc. But that's a BS excuse. It's not super difficult to take 30 minutes a day to read everything I need to study. It's not hard to sit on the weekends and get in 4 hours of studying. But I don't do that. Neither do most of the people I know.

Sure effort put in is directly related to perceived benefits. But commitment is a whole different field. If you decided to do something, there has to be some level of dedication. Even if you realised that you made a mistake right at the start about the commitment.

Commitment...discipline...dedication...perspective...maturity....

Okay so yes I know I am doing everything and anything but hit my books which I should be.

Ill go study :( [It was never this tough - I have changed]

Interesting Conversations...

Well I had a rather long phone conversation yesterday - (a long phone conversation isn't really unusual but a phone conversation is - was never a phone person and don't think I will ever be).

Anyway lots of interesting discussions took place. In a way we discussed strategies, plans, ideas, people, attitudes, approaches, gossip, and lots more.

Everything is about lessons and there was lots there -
1) Keep going even after you believe you have done better than you could.
2) Nothing is a secret
3) Companions are companions but are important.
4) Everyone has a set of strengths, some people were meant to deal with people while others were meant to sit in their corner and do their thing.
5) All factors needn't change, if a few are changed smartly, the output can be profitable.

When I have more time, I'll write more.

Face to a Name...

:)

It as a good day.

I got to meeting a couple of people today, I knew only remotely.

It's nice to build relationships. It's nice to know people have your back.

Confrontation...

I don't know why but all my life I have tried to avoid confrontations as much as possible. Human confrontation that is. Confronting your fears etc is something totally different. The definition I am going by is - a hostile disagreement face-to-face.

I think it's because I never forgot people who were nasty (thankfully not too many people are nasty to me - which I find strange actually cause it's not like people who are nasty are only nasty toward some). I don't think I would forgive such people either. The memory of their actions would stay with me no matter how cordial we were on the surface or how much 'closer' we would have become after a span of time.

All confrontations have some bad blood involved. There is always something that someone doesn't like. But there are instances when a confrontation is very important. It might be selfish or it might be the exact opposite but honest things have to be said to people. And obviously these honest things will not be accepted very well.

I have realised that to improve personally, I need to confront people (who need confrontation) more often and I will.

If you haven't watched Lost, you're missing out on good stuff...

Just finished watching Season 2 and it's so mind blowing.
I think everyone should check the show out. It really messes with your head cause you keep wondering what's going on.
It's a show that has real good mystery. It's being made really well.

Got to study got to study got to study...

Yup I have got to study.

Who would have thought going back to books would be so tough. I mean I use to be a good student. Super lazy but still good. Sure I could have done much better if I had worked harder but that's a different story. Now I find that it's so difficult to concentrate. I guess when you are a student the core work of your life is to study so you end up doing it well but when you have other 'jobs' and have to study at the same time, the other work gets priority.

Anyway I hate our education system because only now when I work do I understand half the non sense that I studied because it all was in my books when I was 16.

My question is - What is the point of doing something when there is no real significance of doing that thing, at that point in time? It's like reading Don Quixote when you are 10.

The Bigger Picture...

Do you see it? I usually don't and I realise that I need to.

So what is the bigger picture? Is there a limit to how big the bigger picture can be? Is there always a bigger picture? Do you absolutely need the bigger picture? Is 'the bigger picture' just a management jargon? Are you going to fail if you can't see the bigger picture? Do you become a visionary if you see the bigger picture? Do you have to be a visionary to see the bigger picture? Is there always a bigger picture? And if there is, do you always need to see it?.....

See nothing is as simple as it seems...get the picture?

Happy Commercialization Day...

Well talk about rotten luck. Was writing this really good post and my comp hung and had to restart it. Lost the post. Funny thing is I am more sad than I am angry.

Anyway will try and re-write as much as I can remember.

Was sure that I had written a post on Valentine's Day last year - Same nick, different year.
Different year, different sentiments? No.

Though when I read the previous post it sounds very harsh. Maybe I had just heard a news story about sales of Hallmark, Archies and the likes.

So do I believe in love this year? Nope. Do I support Valentine's Day? Nope. Do I think we are stupid? Yes.

Anyway read 3 lines of this article, which I am assuming would have been interesting, which said that environmentalists now are lashing out at V Day because of increased sale of flowers in the UK. These flowers get imported so there is a huge cost attached to them. Financially and environmentally too. One more reason to boo Valentine's Day hehe.

Anyway it makes me think about why it is that we get so caught up in our daily routine lives that we don't have 'special' days everyday of the year. Is it that we don't know how to manage our lives? Don't know how to prioritize? Is it that we expect too much when we expect life to be more special? Is it inbuilt into our systems that we will only be grateful for things once we have lost them? Is it that we think we will have tomorrow to do what we should have done today and couldn't?

Lots of questions...no answers.

I can most probably see next year's post (if I am still blogging then). Same nick, different year. Maybe I will say something like, I was in a pensive mood that day. Different year, different mood.

Why it's hilarioussssssssss...

Okay so let me be honest - if I don't say the prank was super hilarious then I have to admit that it was super embarrassing.

Hilarioussssssss

Now I don't like thinking of myself as gullible, who does? But I have to admit I fell for this one.
Now you do have total permission to laugh on this one but do note that I felt like such a fool when it was all over.
What's even worse is that EVERYONE was in on this one and I fell for it BADLY.

Okay so a colleague of mine comes across this website that gives a free demo for, out going mobile text messages (sms). Don't know how the website or technology works but I guess it allows you to type out a message and send it to a number of your choice.
So I get the following message on my cell phone from 'BJS' - 'Hi, u have won a New Moto Razr 4 buying a Motorola Phone nd also using d ringtone Phone Uthao Phone Uthao.Contact 98-------- (an actual mobile number) 4 collecting ur phone'

Yes I know how stupid to even read a message like this but still I went around the office showing this to some people cause I thought it was hilarious that I get a message saying that I will win a new Moto Razr for buying one already. So I even go ask our tech guy if they are doing some testing and stuff but he says no (I don't think he was in on it)

Anyway Bhavna insists that I should call the number up and see what happens. I obviously say I won't do any such thing, so she asks me for the number and dialed it on her phone and when it was ringing was shoving her phone at me to talk when someone picks up. I said no out right. So someone answer the number and says 'Welcome to 'BJ Technologies', how may I help you' in a damn weird accent. So Bhavna then passes on the phone to Binda who starts talking to this female (on speaker).

The conversation is something like this -

Weird Accent : Welcome to BJ Technologies
Binda : Ya who is this
WA : This is BJ Technologies
Binda : What?
WA : BJ Technologies.
B : What is this? Is it a company
WA : Yes Madam
B : Where are you located?
WA : Andheri East
B : Okay, I got a message from you people saying that I have won a moto razr.
WA : Okay can you please give me your name and I will check my database.
B : Deepali
WA : Right madam your name is there, so you have won a phone.
B : How have I won this phone?
WA : By lucky draw madam.
B : How was my name picked
WA : From names in our database. Can you come collect the phone today?
B : Where do I have to come?
WA : Saki Naka
B : No I don't think I can come there and pick it up. Can you deliver it to me?
WA : What is your address?
B : 123, abc def (gives the office address)
WA : I am sorry can you repeat
B : 123, abc def, got it?
WA : Yes madam
B : ghi jkl mno pqr (completes the address)
WA : Okay madam we will deliver it to you. You will be available between 9 am and 3 pm at this address tomorrow right? (it's a friday)
B : No not tomorrow, can you send it on Monday.
WA : Okay we will send it on Monday, you will be available between 9 am and 3 pm right?
B : Yes (pause) How are you going to send it
WA : We have our own courier company.
B : Okay what is your name?
WA : (Name) some name that I don't remember.
B : Okay thank you, bye.

Suddenly Binda , Bhavna and all are asking me how I won this. And I am like "how would I know? I don't know. Maybe it's got to do with the place I bought my phone from. Don't know where it is from though, maybe I'll call home and ask if the phone was purchased that BJS.

So I called my sis up (ya it looks very stupid a move, right now). And ask her the name of the company and whether it's BJS. She says she doesn't know and can check the bill for me. She ask why and I tell her the story of the SMS. She finds out that I haven't purchased the phone from any such company. So I tell her it's okay.

Everyone around now is asking me how these people knew not only that I have a new phone (which is a VERY big deal in itself), but also know that I have this ring-tone. Miss B comes up with the theory they must have got my number when I downloaded that ring tone. But I tell them I didn't download it and it just got forwarded. Anyway we all get back to work.

After about 30 mins I get a second message from BJS saying -
Thank you for returning our call and confirming your address. Please send us a DD for Rs. 12000 as a membership to BJ Tech. Thank u and welcome to BJ Club.

I am then thinking shit man - nothing in life comes for free - how depressing. And kinda sad that I am not going to get a new phone. Then I worry about whether they will actually send the phone before the DD reaches them. Yes I know - the whole incident is very stupid. Anyway I think why go through the headache on Monday morning so I reply to the second message saying 'I'm not interested' but the message fails (this is just an outgoing message demo). So I think chuck it, I got better things to do right now and that Monday morning might be painful cause I might have to get on the phone and fight with someone about how I wasn't told I was suppose to be a member and the membership number.

So I am working and after another 30 minutes I get a call from BJ Technologies (same weird accented female) asking me to confirm the address. So I say start walking out of my room cause it's too noisy saying 'ya I'm not interested'. What I don't realise is that while I am walking toward the main door, the whole bunch of people are standing around. The female starts to say something else and I realise that the voice is coming from the phone and also from around. I turn around to see the gang and I see it's Priyanka talking to me on the phone. LOL. And as soon as I realise everyone bursts out laughing.

Ah well I haven't had too many pranks played on me (thank god otherwise people might realise how gullible I am). But it wasn't super fun when everyone was standing around laughing. And I mean everyone. And all of them were in on it from the start man.

Anyway what I am happy about is that it was well executed. Also everyone acted it fantastically. Bhavna with her eagerness to get me my new 'free' phone (btw BJS are her initials - yes I know that you are also realising that I am gullible AND stupid). Binda for having that whole conversation with the weird accent woman. And Priyanka for being the weird accent lady. Very well executed.

Hats Off.

I refused to play in your tragedy...

To & Fro by Mattafix.
Fantastic song.
Where is the connection? This is a line from their song.

R.I.P. Bahadur - The best liftman there ever was...

My earliest memories of going up and down in the lift have images of Bahadur. The short Nepali guy who would keep blinking his small eyes all the time. He was always at work when his shift was there. We troubled him a lot on days we went and sat on the building terrace. Would keep telling him to lock up just before his shift ended at midnight, and he would oblige.

He was also the most efficient lift man there was. It might sound like I'm crazy, but he would actually stand properly in his corner, open the doors faster than the other guys, switch on the fan before pressing the floor button.

He was such a strong part of this building that many of my relatives from abroad would actually enquire if was actually still around, how he was, etc.

He use to also tell me that I should walk up by chairs to lose some weight :)

You will be missed Bahadur

Chance pe dance

I hate BAD people who are opportunists.

Thanks...

Thank you to everyone who took the effort to remember my birthday and took the extra effort to wish me.
And thanks to everyone also who realised it was my birthday and took the extra effort to wish me.

It was fantastic receiving so many calls and SMS's this year.

I swear I will make it a point to wish people on their birthday.

Thanks to everyone at office too for letting me get away with one song, that too sung in a group. And the cake cutting too, on my birthday and not on a Friday.

Also just for the record - I don't view birthdays as days to celebrate. Any day that makes you think of your past and your future is a depressing day.

All we have is dreams...

Yes I corrected it to 'all we have are dreams' - thanks to Nisha whose question to me was - what sort of english is this -this is the same person who put up a sign saying 'Please cover your heads at the puja' - lol my aunt just asked her one question too - so how many heads do you have Nisha?

Anyway was watching a movie - Between Strangers - and don't know but I held on to the line. At least it's food for tough...

HTML is a nightmare...

Well was trying to change the code (template) of my blog and was super frustrated because I would have to make a change, save it, publish it, check the blog, check out if the change I wanted was done or not, if not then figure out what changed, go back to the template and undo the change, publish and then change something again.

Don't have to bother with that anymore because the new blogger allows customization in a very simple way....

You're Beautiful...

For those who don't know, 'you're beautiful' is a song by James Blunt. I love it but I don't know why.

Anyway lyrics of songs make the most interesting nick names at times because it makes people wonder what is up. I mean instead of 'you're beautiful', I was going to put up 'we shared a moment that will last 'till the end', which would have got tons of people asking me what the hell I was talking about haha. Or even 'but it's time to face the truth, I will never be with you'. At least some of my friends would have pinged me asking me about whom I was talking.

Anyway try and check out the song. The lyrics of the song are -

My life is
brilliant.

My life is brilliant
My love is
pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She
smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause
I've got a plan.

You're beautiful.
You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's
true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I
don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be
with you.

Yes, she caught my eye,
As we walked
on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
Fucking
high,
And I don't think that I'll see her
again,
But we shared a moment that will last 'till the
end.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in
a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.

La la la
la la la la la la

You're beautiful. You're
beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she
thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to
face the truth,
I will never be with you.

Dedication without passion?...

Is it possible to have Dedication without Passion?

I think so...

Is it possible to have Satisfaction without Passion?

I think so...

Is it possible to have Happiness without Passion?

I don't know...

Marriages, Marriages & more Marriages

And again I repeat myself -

Indians are obsessed about marriages.

I attended a sangeet party last night and about a week ago came to know that a colleague is engaged and will be married sometime this year, and also have a friend who will be married next month. I also got news of school friends (not in touch with them so heard from a friend I happened to bump into) - one of which got engaged this December, another got married a few months ago.

In the next 2 - 3 years, I would have heard of so many more people I know, getting married. I most probably will get invited to some too. And I can't help but think this is soooo wrong.
I mean how can anyone get married because -
1) They are of marriageable age
2) They want to get 'settled down'
3) They want to have children
4) They are lonely and want companionship
5) They won't find a better prospect.
6) They want financial security - and any other security
7) They want their partner to be only theirs.
etc etc etc

Now there is nothing wrong with these reasons if you want to get married period. But people want to get married and be happy too. I mean really if you do something so drastic (life altering), for reasons that are so wrong, then how are you going to he happy?

I believe that people don't even understand what a marriage is. It's not an institution, it's not a spiritual bonding, it's not a way to make someone more loyal. If you ask me what a marriage is, I would tell you in two words what a marriage really is. It is a legal agreement. That's it - nothing more and nothing less. It legitimizes a relationship.

In life you got to the things for the right reasons. And you must understand what is right and what is logical.

What is the right reason to get married? Well I don't know but for me it's none of the above. I think IF I EVER did get married it would be because everyone around me would be forcing me to marry the person I was living in with and I would finally give up to get some peace of mind.

And let me not get started about HOW people get married.
Man soooooo much money spend on a few days worth of rituals and partying. Not cool. I am sure I could go on a world trip, thrice over, with the kind of money spent on some of the weddings I have attended recently.
I understand 'celebrating' and all of that but this is totally insane, especially in todays day and age when people get divorced so quickly.
Anyway we Indians - we will always be obsessed with marriage.

So many serial killers suddenly?...

Well the real question isn't about so many serial killers, as much it is as 'suddenly'.
And that isn't a real question either.

Because there are lots of sickos out there. And a lot of serial killers. (I am sure there are so many murders that haven't been traced to be a 'signature' of a serial killer as yet.)

It's just that as a nation we choose to believe that serial killers, paedophiles don't exist amongst us. We don't believe things like child molestation, incest, cannibalism etc happen.

And when something as big as what happen in Noida, becomes breaking news, everyone eats it up cause it's so 'unbelievable'. And then the new channels go on this crazy mode where all they talk endlessly about is serial killers. And then the police also SUDDENLY start finding serial killers everywhere.

I think we have to start believing that there are BAD things out there. That people who look 'normal' might have 'conditions' that many of us don't understand. It's about time we realized that things 'like these' aren't just a phenomenon in the West and that all this stuff doesn't happen because 'those people' are 'dirty'.

If you don't believe the problem exists, how will you find a solution?

No TV :'(

I already have borderline depression...

Lost track of Lost this year because of the stupid ban on Star Movies in Mumbai.

Now I am loosing track of Law and Order SVU *sob*

I was also just getting hooked onto Grey's Anatomy...

Have to start taking tough stands...I have to do the dirty work...

Got a promotion and realised that I now have a more 'organizational' thought process. Obviously part of my responsibility is to see that the organization succeeds not just my projects but I never realised that I would be taking this so seriously.
I was taking decisions everyday when I was running projects but those were easy decisions. The decisions I have to make now are tough decisions because now my job is more about 'people management'. I am going to be having a lot of meanings and telling people where and how they are screwing up. And maybe also the consequences of their mess ups.
Well it is dirty work but I will do it...

Helping Hands are better than Praying Lips...

Good intentions, without actions, are useless.

Evolution...

Don't know if I have written about this already, but I totally believe in the theory of evolution, not mainly because it makes the most sense but because I can see with my own eyes that everything is evolving. Evolving today, evolving now. What was a hundred years ago, isn't the same today. Look at diseases becoming more virulent, look at diseases jumping animals, look at new diseases like SARS, this is all because viruses are evolving.

Anyway I also believe Evolution of one thing causes a chain reaction. If evolutions of something, doesn't cause a reaction, I believe that which has evolved will either change again or will perish. That which has evolved and survived, has made other things also evolve.
Also evolution isn't necessarily of living, breathing, growing species. It also happens in inanimate objects. My whole though on evolution started up because we were talking about 'gratuity' in office. Now my knowledge on gratuity and other taxes is very limited but I know that you will get gratuity back, if you work for 5 years with a company. I couldn't help but think how archaic this law was, especially today and especially in the newer industries and especially in the bigger cities. Today job security is never top of mind. Professionals today are confident in their ability to get jobs. What people look for is better salaries, better job satisfaction, better work culture. This requires many times to switch jobs, which obviously means that people will not be at any company for 5 years. Bottom line, the work environment is changing. The law should be changed so that the 'aam aadmi' or 'salaried middle class' don't feel like they are being robbed of their hard earned money.

Will this happen? I don't know when but I do believe that the law will have to change. It will have to evolve...

0 ambition...

I have been asking myself all sorts of questions but like always come up with nothing.
The first of the questions was the easiest and I have a satisfactory answer. The rest I am still struggling with. This line of question is being pursued because I believe I have no ambition but a lot of ability, and that ability is useless unless there is ambitions. While goals and targets are just as good to see you get to some place, if you have no ambition you don't have goals unless someone sets them for you. The problem, with someone else deciding your goals is that unless they want lots done by you, you will never realise your true potential and never your heart's desire.


1> Are people born with ambition?
I never believe that people are born with anything. Strong believer of nurture over nature. The only thing you really get from parents are physical - features, illnesses, etc. Things like attitude, personality etc, I believe we pick up as we go along and therefore I don't believe that people are born with ambition.

2> Can you develop ambition?
Obviously. Cause if you aren't born with it, it's something that you will develop. This lead me to the more correct question of whether ambition could be developed consciously. Consciously meaning developing ambition with the intent of developing ambition.

3> Assuming ambition can be developed consciously, how does one develop it?
This I still can't figure. Keep working at something? Set goals for self that are difficult? Look at what you might like doing and do it even if it's not something you do regularly? A little of all of the above? I don't know...I wonder if I ever will.

The Chill

Got out of my office building this evening at around 8 p.m. and realized how cool (even cold) it has suddenly become. Of course the entrance to the building has this very high ceiling and these wide walls and therefore the wind really blows there but even as I was sitting the rickshaw, I nearly shivered cause not only was it windy but it was a cold wind.
I feel unhappy that I am in an air conditioned room all day long and am missing out on this fantastic weather. Even when I am home it's either in my room in front of the comp or in the hall in front of the TV - makes me feel guilty about having a terrace.
Maybe this should be my new year resolution - to enjoy 30 mins of fresh air either early in the morning or at night when I am at home. Lets see I'll give it a shot from tom.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year people...

For me (even though December 2006 has been so super) -

No New Year Resolutions - stopped making those a few years back when I realised I don't keep them.

No desires or expectations - except not feeling bad about 2007 getting over, on 31st Dec 2007.

No hopes or dreams - never had any. But if in 2007 I accomplish great things I will be happy.

No goals or ambitions - going with the flow as always.

Though I do wish that all your hope and dreams become realities and that you can accomplish all your ambitions and succeed in all your resolutions.

Have a great 2007.